You gotta get back up. Get back in the saddle. I am trying.
To say that I am disappointed is an understatement. That was like my dream job and the universe held it in front of my face only to snatch it away for a lack of experience with no practical way to get that experience.
As always, when life knocks you down (or the horse, or the boss, or whatever) you have to get back up again. So now my game plan is this: I have contacted a local dressage stable and asked if we might work out a deal where I take a lesson every week and in turn, I will work for them. This provides me with two levels of experience, both on, and off, horse back. And it gives them pretty much free labor.
I'm only contacting one stable at a time, because I don't want a bunch of refusals all at once because my spirit in this matter is currently quite broken, and I do not wish to risk it fully broken.
I wish, oh I wish, I could have had that sort of childhood where I had riding lessons and a horse with sense and had gone to school for horses instead of art. But... here I am still. Gotta keep slogging on.